Am I Making A Sound

Can you listen to me?

I’m pushing

the sound out.

My vocal cords vibrating

attempting to reach out to you.

Mouth open

moving

forming the words I so urge you to hear.

Your eyes meet mine.

Finally

you can hear me,

you understand what I’m saying,

you are listening to me.

Then your eyes glaze past,

and the sound of your booming

voice overpowers

mine.

Leaving me a whisper.

Perhaps I wasn’t being loud enough.

So I try again,

louder,

But your eyes don’t meet mine this time.

Can you hear me?

I wait patiently for a gap

in your words

to insert myself.

Carefully watching the preeminent movements

of your mouth,

each potent vowel,

the flash of your teeth,

the slash of your tongue,

interlace singing your sound.

I too wish to sing,

so I wait.

And wait some more.

Until I see your pause.

A breath,

you stop and look out

past me,

pleased with your words.

I seize my opportunity.

Quickly repeating

my own song.

Louder and louder

until I am screaming.

I am screaming

at you.

You who will not look at me

or talk to me.

My lungs are pushing out air

but I cannot breathe.

My throat is red

and raw.

Burning

through me,

as my thoughts

blare

out to you.

But you stare on

as if I am silent.

A mere shadow

on the wall,

unseen,

unheard,

unimportant.

Still I will continue to scream,

yell,

wail,

howl,

until you hear me.

I will blister

my words into your mind

as the sun

in my mouth

shines.

My words streaming like sun rays,

a breeding ground for thought,

as they touch you

and beyond you.

Sinking in and settling

like treasure long lost in the ocean.

My mind is a gift,

my words are its vessel,

and you will know this ship

in our shared sea.

So I keep talking,

perfecting each syllable,

nursing each thought,

preparing my symphony.

And when it plays

it will be powerful.

And although you won’t hear me,

my bleeding throat

my bruised tongue

my battered lips

will still speak.

And my words

will be deafening.